This week has been a blur, like parts of both images. You see, depth of field and what it means sums up my life pretty well. There are things I can keep in pin point focus, but others are out of focus. Sometimes, most everything is out of focus. That scares me. I am a detail person, in fact it is part of my personality. I’m not the kind of person that worries about all the details when I am doing something, but I notice all the details of everything around me. Except when I don’t. When I am hyper-focused. When I am preoccupied. When my reality is dangerous and I can’t control it. I begin to miss details. I am aware of this, but I can do nothing to change it. I begin to lose the one thing that has gotten me so far in life, and it scares me. I fear missing the details, I fear missing something important that will give me an edge.
I fear losing my mind.
